In the American media, how many times have you read comments about the bodies of celebrities? She is too fat, he is jacked, she needs Ozempic, and the classic, she looks sick! Reporters, influencers, and everyday people all seem to feel entitled to make judgments about the body shape and size of anyone who dares to step in front of a camera’s flashbulb. In addition, this attitude of criticizing bodies translates to personal examples in the lives of ordinary people. I, personally, have been told both that I was obese, and how great I looked when I lost a substantial amount of weight. My question is: why is my body any of your business? How dare anyone busy themselves with considering my shape and appearance. How dare they torture famous women and men with harassing comments only meant to criticize. So, as my own protest to these actions, let us consider here in The Ladybug a little education on body image.
First, I would like to state the obvious: bodies come in all forms and sizes. There is no one body that is better than any other. The term, “fat,” should not be considered an insult. The look of thinness should not be considered an ideal. Why should we let society dictate how we feel about our own bodies? The only thing that matters is the health of our bodies. This should not be determined by the BMI (Body Mass Index), but by measures such as blood pressure and lab tests. If your body is healthy and functioning correctly, your weight and shape should be accepted as beautiful no matter the number on the scale. The diversity in bodies is something to celebrate! It would be terribly boring if we all looked the same. So, why do we try to force our poor bodies to conform to an image that is expected of us. Women, specifically, are taught to shrink themselves into America’s vision of beauty. I say, let your body find its happy set point, the size where it wants to maintain itself naturally, and enjoy. Your unique body is a gift, embrace it!
Second, you may be asking yourself how I can speak so freely about the diversity in bodies. Perhaps, you might wonder if I do not feel the pressure to look acceptable. However, let me assure you that I have come to this rebellious standpoint on body image through my own struggles. I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa when I was 20 years old, after I fell into the behaviors of a serious eating disorder at age 18. I am still not fully recovered from my eating disorder 20 years later, but I am committed to the fight. For years, I cycled through hospital hallways and the offices of dieticians. Sometimes, it felt like I would never make peace with food, and there seemed to be no escape. One must eat every day to stay alive, and, so, I confronted my eating disorder at mealtimes and felt its cruel thoughts that rocked my mind. But, little by little, the therapies I was receiving and the supports of family and friends began to make a difference in my healing. In addition, as my faith in God deepened, I realized that I was not alone in my battles with food and body image. I have come a long way, and today I have drawn a truce with my body. I seek to love my body and give her what she needs. Specifically, I ask her daily what she desires, and I approach eating with an intuitive mind. Do I love my weight? No. But I actively choose to not focus my energies anymore on the number I see on a scale. It means nothing about my worth as a person, and I firmly believe that statement.
Third, let me give some advice. Do NOT make comments about other people’s bodies. Obey this rule NO Matter What! If you want to know why someone put on weight or lost it, then say Nothing, because it is not your concern. There are so many reasons why bodies change. Reasons for shape changes can be aging, health concerns, eating disorders, medication side effects, etc. The only reason to discuss someone’s weight with them is if they bring it up themselves. Also, commenting on the weight of a pregnant woman is a no-go, they are growing a human! Suggesting that a man or woman, “hit the gym,” is also completely unacceptable. There are many forms of movement and exercise, and one should choose movement that is joyful and provides happiness. I, myself, need to rest a lot due to my chronic health problems, and I am not physically able to maintain a strict exercise regime. Society would like me to feel guilty about this fact, however, I refuse to force my body to do something she is not capable of just so that I may fit in. When it comes to health advice, leave it to a trained medical professional. Commenting on body image, exercise, and weight loss/gain is never a smart idea.
In conclusion, I would like to reach out to my sisters and brothers who are struggling with eating disorders. It is a difficult road, and treatment is not always affordable. Many suffer in silence. Please, if you are experiencing trouble with eating or negative body image, reach out for help through any means available. Eating disorders are serious and deadly. However, breaking the stigma and ending the silent suffering of those who experience any type of disordered eating is crucial. If you are a family member or friend of someone with an eating disorder, my advice is to love them and stand by them. They need your support and healing presence. I have linked below The National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) and The Multi-Service Eating Disorders Association, INC (MEDA). I have personally received assistance from both organizations, and I can recommend their support services.
Finally, do not succumb to the pressures of American culture, which supports a twisted concept of body image and weight. Instead, be a rebel, and embrace your own beautiful, wonderful, unique body with all your heart and mind. You are already perfect, so go be authentically you!
With Acceptance, G.
P.S. I have displayed below a photo of myself at the 2019 NEDA Walk in Boston, MA.
Home – National Eating Disorders Association
MEDA Inc. | Multi-Service Eating Disorders Association
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