The Ladybug

Tag: Coping Skills

  • Real Life War and Peace, and How to Cope 

    I am writing today from a warm and safe cabin located in rural New England.  My life is safe as I sit here and type these words.  However, I cannot ignore the news of what is going on in the world.  I must admit that I have never felt so ashamed or embarrassed to be an American.  In addition, I have also never had less confidence in any president or leader of this formerly great nation.  Trump has attacked Iran and started a dangerous and risky war.  I do not support this action, and I am terrified about what the consequences will be now and in the long term.  From having friends and family who live in the Middle East, as well as friends in the USA military, I feel the effects of this war as it impacts me personally.  I also fear the ways in which Iran may retaliate in the days and weeks to come.  The world was already a destabilized place, with the war in Ukraine fueled by Putin, and the humanitarian crisis in Gaza, along with our president attacking our allies and endangering our own neighborhoods with ICE officers.  Now, he has started a war which never needed to be.   

    I feel so helpless.  I am a single human on this earth with little money or resources.  My personal situation has been one of my recent poor health and a crisis that has extended for months now that I cannot discuss further in the blog.  So, what difference can I make as I read the news headlines and listen to the radio?  I see so much suffering, and I wish I could help alleviate the pain.  But what to do?   Well, my brainstorming session on that topic is what I plan to convey in this post. 

    First, Pray.  Go to God.  The ultimate control of my life or anyone else’s is not their own but belongs to our loving creator.  While He allows us free will, He longs for us to turn to Him and build a relationship of trust and honest communication.  If you are mad, yell at God.  If you feel blessed, praise God.  If you feel helpless, as I do, tell Him, and ask for guidance as to how to act and proceed.  My faith in God ensures that I go nowhere in life alone.  I have a higher power who loves me and takes my hand through all the weather.  What is currently happening is a storm, and I already feel my strength being tested.  I’m scared, but I want to be brave.  God can improve our hearts and minds and bodies to have strength and bravery if we ask Him.  I am praying, will you join me? 

    Second, act peacefully.  This may seem like a huge contradiction during a time of war but hear me out.  For example, being peaceful can simply be a gesture of listening to your neighbor when you talk about a difficult topic like politics or war.  Instead of reacting with hostility to differences, try to gain mutual respect and hold space for the other side, even if you still strongly disagree.  I feel that as a progressive Christian, I am called to be open with my opinions on topics such as racial equality and justice, while still understanding that there are some minds that I cannot change.  In addition, I try to love the people in my life who believe in the opposite political sides of the aisle, and when I struggle to do so, I pray to Jesus for help.  And yes, what about Jesus?  When He was crucified, did He fight and tell His disciples to draw their swords?  No, Jesus sets an example of sacrificial peace, knowing that even if the outcome of our right doing is death, that is not the end of the road.  Jesus rose from the grave, and we too look forward to life after death.  In all circumstances, therefore, try to remain peaceful in your actions, following the teachings of Christ. 

    And third, take gentle care of yourself.  Our country and the world are on fire.  War has come in more than one place, and there is great suffering.  To help myself get through the inevitable stress, I am trying to participate in activities that relieve my soul.  Today, for example, I took a nice long walk in the winter sunshine, an elusive sight.  It felt healing to see the beautiful blue sky above me, and to feel the almost-spring warmth on my face.  The snow was melting, and there was mud on the earth.  Even with the terrible goings-on in the world, the seasons were still preparing to change.  In addition, when I was getting myself lunch, I made a homemade matcha green tea latte, a luxury.  I do not know how much longer I will be able to find and buy matcha, my favorite drink along with coffee, and so I savored it, every sip.  I encourage you to find simple joys such as these two examples and comfort your heart with them.  

    I leave you with a single thought; God is Good.  His love endures forever.  He will not let our world suffer forever.  It will be alright in the end, and if it is not alright, then it is not the end!  So, take heart, stay close to God and your loved ones, and take care of yourself.  Difficult days are here, but we are not alone.  Never give up! 

    In Love and Respect, G.  

  • Perfectionism Part 2: My Truth and 10 Coping Skills for Depression

    I like to ask myself the question: How is it with my soul?  This is not a phrase unique to me, but one that I have heard from many religious leaders throughout my life.  Unfortunately, the truth of the answer to that question in my life is often messy.  Life is tough, and I find that there seems to always be a struggle.  However, there is another question I frequently ask myself that goes along with the first one: How do I want to appear on social media?  I VERY rarely tell the truth of the answer to question 1 when I consider the answer to question 2.  Social media seems to be too often a place for me to hide and deceive, rather than to be honest and raw.  No one sees the scars.  No one sees anything wrong.  I am perfect. 

                Well, today I want to pull the curtain back slightly and discuss a topic close to my heart which is mental health.  Yesterday, October 10th, was #Worldmentalhealthday and while I posted a nice photo and cute caption to my Instagram and Facebook accounts, I really was not sharing much.  Mental health has been a struggle for me since I was quite young, but the stigma surrounding it has often stopped me from dialoging openly about my experiences.  As I have shared on The Ladybug, my blog, I have been ill with a physical disease from a tick bite since mid-April 2025, and the journey to recovery has been a rough one.  What I have not said is the way this disease has changed my mental abilities.  Let’s talk about it.

                I have become extremely anxious and much more depressed since I got sick in April.  In addition, I have horrible bouts of brain fog and cognitive confusion that make it difficult for me to do my college schoolwork and do it well.  For the sake of this blog, I want to focus on talking about my depression.  I am extremely sensitive to medications for depression, and so, unfortunately, that line of treatment is unavailable to me.  I must rely mainly on lifestyle changes and coping skills learned in therapy to treat the symptoms.  This is very difficult.  I wish so much that there was a magic cure for the darkness that creeps into my mind.  I must thank my parents who have been Super supportive throughout my struggle, and my friends who have prayed for me.  God is Good, and I am not alone.

                While acknowledging the deep pain of difficult to treat depression, I also want to focus on all the many ways to attack this mental illness.  Here are some of the ways that I have been coping:

    1. Talking to a professional therapist and psychiatrist.  It is helpful for me to have an objective professional hear me discuss what is happening and support me with cognitive behavioral therapy sessions.  In addition, I see a Nurse Practitioner for extra support.
    2. Taking time to study the Bible and connect with God while journaling and listening to music.  This is my “Spirit Time,” and it sustains my soul with the light I need.
    3. Walks with the family dog outside in the sunlight, preferably through the woods.  Nature combined with gentle exercise can be quite healing.
    4. Looking at a relaxing magazine or loosing myself in a funny light-hearted book.  This changes my mental scenery.
    5. Not going on social media too much, and only remaining on sites that support my soul.  For example, I love ballet posts on Instagram, as well as inspirational Christian posts.
    6. Trying to keep eating and hydrating.  I tend to stop eating when I am depressed, and good nutrition is crucial.  In addition, staying sober, and only drinking favorite things like black coffee and matcha lattes is important!
    7. Talking!  I must not loose contact with those who love me!  I know I am not alone, and friendship and family, including church family, is a lovely tonic. 
    8. Writing.  You, readers, are a support for me as well, even if you did not know it.  I find a great deal of purpose through my writing, and typing away my crazy thoughts on The Ladybug, or the book I am currently writing, is quite meaningful.
    9. NEVER GIVE UP!!!  Putting that on repeat. NEVER GIVE UP!!!  Amen!
    10. Take it 5 minutes at a time when things get bad; every 24 hours is a victory!

    It was helpful for me to review these skills as I typed, and my hope is to help others. 

    My social media platforms show smiles non-stop, but I want those who struggle to know that it is okay not to be perfect, because I certainly am not!!  I have deeper thoughts and deeper pain that is a real and sometimes everyday burden.  You are not alone.  God is an ever-present help, just ask! 

    I also want to share that if someone is reading this and feels in crisis, please call 988, the national hotline.  Or visit www.afsp.org  

    The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention is a great resource for support!!

    Blessings my friends! Thank you for sharing the truth with me. G.

  • God’s Presence During Hardships

    How does one cope when times are overwhelming?  Recently, I have been feeling stressed for both societal and personal reasons.  The USA is in a difficult spot politically, with a constant stream of bad news.  In my own life, I am facing uncertainties medically, and am in a wait-and-see period.  However, I can honestly say that despite these set-backs, I am feeling grateful and blessed.  You may wonder if I am crazy and how this is possible…well, let me share my secrets.

                My faith in God is the core of my life.  I believe that I am never alone in the struggles I face.  There is a greater force in the universe that guides my path.  As a progressive Christian, this season of lent has been a time to draw closer to God and His promises for my life.  God never promises that life will be easy or pain free.  Instead, He assures us that we never travel this bumpy life alone.  We have a loving companion in Jesus Christ, who comforts our hearts and holds us while we shed tears.  There is a song that was written on the walls of a Nazi concentration camp during World War II by an anonymous author with the words, “I believe in God, even when He is silent.”  The incredible faith of the author amazes me.  During our tough times, God never disappears or walks away from us.  Even when we can not sense Him as strongly, He is right there with His loving arms wrapped around us. 

                You may be asking yourself; how do I connect to God if I can not feel Him?  My first answer is always the same: PRAY!  Prayer is a great communication tool that God has gifted to us.  Your prayer does not have to be perfect, pretty, or even make sense.  Just start talking.  Say what you need.  A simple prayer of HELP is always a good start.  Remember, God already knows what is going on in your life and what your needs are.  He’s waiting to establish a loving dialogue with you.  Another useful way to pray is to have a mantra, a word to repeat until you feel calm, such as “Abba” or “Father” or “Jesus.”  The idea of prayer is to create a bond between you and the spirit of God; therefore, the technicalities and perfections of your words do not matter, only that you try.  God is waiting to hear you!

                Another great way to connect with God and feel God’s peace is to appreciate the beauties of the natural world.  Depending on your circumstances and health, this may look like sitting in your back yard watching the birds, taking a walk in the woods, or even hiking a mountain trail.  I have always found something incredibly soothing about nature and enjoying God’s creation.  Meditation comes easily to me when I am alone with trees and flowers.  The noise of man-made vehicles and busy streets blocks me from relaxation.  However, if I can escape to a small moment of being “one with the universe” through observing nature, I feel I am at home.  Nothing can rattle me as I feel God gently whisper, “If I can care for all of this, how much more do I love you, dear one?”  When you feel like life is just too much to bear, find time to touch your palm to a tree trunk or flower petal, and know how much God loves you.

                Finally, take time to read God’s Word.  We are all very busy in American society, and taking time to read the Bible seems impossible at times.  It may also seem intimidating to read a book like the Bible, with so many stories you may wonder where to start.  I suggest finding a guided devotion that you enjoy to help your journey of the Word.  I use The Upper Room and The Bible App.  (Neither of these are sponsored) They are tools that help me to stay focused during my devotion time.  In addition, I find several of the Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) books and meditation materials to be helpful in creating a spiritual reading program.  AA guidebooks are great if you are unsure of where to begin with the Bible.  Again, the purpose of studying written Word about God is not about trying to achieve perfection.  Rather, the purpose is to connect you with the loving presence of the Spirit, in hopes that your stress and loneliness melts away.  God is here, waiting for you to reach out!

                To return to the stressors I mentioned at the beginning of this post, both national news and personal medical concerns, I find everything easier to handle and digest when I have armed myself with a close and personal relationship with God.  I will say again, my faith is my rock, and it sees me through the difficulties of life.  I urge you to seek out God through the channels I have mentioned, or through your own creative pathways.  Connecting to a higher power is a chance to find freedom from your stress, and to let go of your burdens for a few hours and rest under God’s wings.  You do not have to face challenges by yourself.  There is a strength greater than human strength, and you can tap into that power for peace at any time, all you need do is ask.

                With Love, G.